Tag Archives: helicoptering
What Do the Experts Say About Boomerang Kids? It’s NOT what you think
Full-grown, twenty-something college graduates are returning home to have their parents continue supporting them due to “immaturity” or because “they just prefer the comforts of home?” And the expert’s take is that there is nothing wrong with that picture?Jaw, meet floor. Maybe there was some mistake. Maybe the expert, wasn’t clear on her meaning. We should give her the benefit of the doubt and look at the answers she and her fellow expert gave to some other pertinent questions. After all, they are on the staff at… CONTINUE READING >>
Smooth Sailing? Not Likely!
I’d been following the controversial Abby Sunderland story with interest. Remember Abby? She was the sixteen-year-old sailor who, while attempting to sail her vessel around the world solo, found herself stranded in the middle of the Indian Ocean. Her parents took quite a bit of flack over the situation. I’d looked at this story from many different angles – and, as usual, my feelings were mixed.The helicopter Mommy in me shouted, “What the &#*% were her parents thinking?!” But after calm reflection I saw things a bit differently. I too have a child with “dangerous dreams.” My son, The Boy, has been flying airplanes since he was thirteen.
Sure, I’ve heard all the arguments… CONTINUE READING >>
I Am NOT a Useless Waste!
Has it happened? Have I become a crotchety old lady? Do I abhor certain kinds of music because I’m too old to get it? Am I shocked at some of the things that “young people” wear these days?
Possibly so. But I’m dead certain of one thing – people are much more rude than they were when I was a young whippersnapper.
Because we have a website I am painfully aware that there are those that don’t treat others with civility. I’ve quit reading the online comments on news stories – it’s horrific.
Then, out of nowhere, cyberspace-type incivility came crashing into Real Life. In a manner that I couldn’t ignore or justify… CONTINUE READING >>
Life After Kids
When Veronica and I began to think about our life after raising kids one of the first things we did was Google “empty nesters.”
We wanted to see if anyone else was looking at this the same way that we were. With a feeling of “isn’t it great that the kids have moved out, and we’ll have life to ourselves again?” To be untethered and free. To wander the globe. To be GypsyNesters instead of empty-nesters.
But no, just about everything we could find was lamenting how terrible it is that the kids aren’t around anymore. Even worse, the biggest item on the first page we clicked into was an enormous ad for an… CONTINUE READING >>
Mom, Stop Coddling Me and Let Me Grow!
We have discussions about the parent / adult “kid” relationship quite frequently here at GypsyNester.com, but it’s quite rare that we get to hear the young adult point of view on our site, other than a few cherished comments in our discussion section.We don’t kid ourselves, we are aware that there aren’t a lot a twenty-something people who get up in the morning and think, hey, let’s see what the geezer set is up to this days.
So we felt pretty good when we came across “The Drawbacks of Being A Boomerang Kid” at YPULSE. In this story a recent college graduate affirms our position on adult offspring returning to the nest.
“Could it be that some … CONTINUE READING >>
You Brought Your MOM to Your Job Interview?
Okay, it’s rave time. Just a warning.I sympathize with helicopter parents, I really do. I was one. I reluctantly stopped hovering once my kids left the nest. I knew that the sovereignty of the Spawns was more important than my own desire to continue colonial rule. Trust me, we’ve ALL benefited from my abdication.
Did I hound my offspring to do their homework when they were kids? You Betcha. Did I have meetings with their high school guidance counselors to voice concerns without the Spawn present? Guilty… CONTINUE READING >>
Things We Wish We’d Known BEFORE We Sent Our Kids to College
With autumn upon us, many new empty nesters have sent a fledgling off to college for the first time. Here are some DOs and DON’Ts on how to get through that first semester without losing your mind. 1. Don’t start off on a bad note. It’s hard to let our kids go. The day our babies head out on their own is a tough one for any parent. Because of her self-awareness about her emotional outbursts, Veronica
… CONTINUE READING >>
Bounce That Boomerang
The subject of Boomerang “Kids” has been in the news a lot lately, and the story we’re being sold is that poor, brave youngsters with new diplomas in hand have no choice but to move back into their old bedrooms at Mom and Dad’s house.
All sorts of numbers have been bandied about, some say a quarter of recent grads are unemployed or underemployed, others say half, and one completely unscientific study proclaiming the preposterous idea that 85 percent… CONTINUE READING >>
Are You a Snow Plow Parent? 7 Modern Parenting Terms
This glossary of modern parenting terms from around the world provides a cautionary tale through definitions. Could a Snow Plow Parent accidently raise a Kidult in a perpetual state of Adultescence?Snow Plow Parents
Like the snow removal apparatus, a Snow Plow Parent will be sure to… CONTINUE READING >>
Parasite "Kids"
What’s worse than a Boomerang “Kid?” A Parasite “Kid.”
While the Boomeranger comes home to rely on its host for room, board and Mama’s cooking, the Parasite will eventually kill its host — latching on and sucking dry retirement savings while out living on its own. Long distance leeching, in a manner of speaking.
In generations past only rich kids that acted this way. We are now seeing a new breed –the middle class Parasite Kid. These… CONTINUE READING >>
Get a Job!
Once again an article online got me thinking. While I don’t necessarily disagree with The Wall Street Journal‘s premise, the headline, Why Kids Today Have it Worse Than Their Parents (Ben Casselman), sure sounds whiney.But the meat of the article has some good infonuggets:
“Today’s 20-somethings are, broadly speaking, the children of the last of the Baby Boomers, those born in the late 1950s and early 1960s. That generation, like this one, came of age in the midst of a brutal recession: The unemployment rate for 18-24 year-olds topped 17% at the end of 1982. (In 2010, it briefly crossed 18%.)”
As a twenty-something back then, yeah, I remember that time well. Things were tight, but we got through it OK.
Now, having recently sent three newly-minted adults out into the world, I have firsthand experience of how both recessions have effected young adults. Lucky me.
It’s no secret that we believe… CONTINUE READING >>
The Old College Pry
How do we know when we’ve become too involved in our offspring’s college education?
Is it okay to call a professor about a dispute over a test score? Should we proofread their papers? Should we have access to their grades if we are paying tuition? Should we storm into the Dean’s office?
I interviewed some college professors and their stories will amaze you… CONTINUE READING >>
"Delayed-Launch Period?" Really?
Uh. I can’t let this one go by. The Wall Street Journal has published an article entitled “Benefits of a Late Launch,” discussing a new book, “Not Quite Adults.”
I haven’t read the book and it’s going to take some time before I gather the fortitude to do so, as the subtitle is enough to make me cringe: “WHY 20-SOMETHINGS ARE CHOOSING A SLOWER PATH TO ADULTHOOD, AND WHY IT’S GOOD FOR EVERYONE.” I want to be clear that I am responding to the Journal article, not the book.
To be fair, before I go off on my own rant, I will cite the benefits as the Journal lays them out… CONTINUE READING >>
The Couple of Things
I was recently interviewed for a magazine article about empty nesting from the Dad’s point of view. As usual, I was happy to add my two cents.
Most of the questions involved the logistics of pulling off our GypsyNester lifestyle, things like selling the house, making an income, traveling and the like, but one question completely caught me by surprise… CONTINUE READING >>
Boomerang "Kids"
A recent advice column I read was just plain disturbing.
It involved a mother who is a newly retired homeowner with an outstanding mortgage. Unless she was the CEO of a major publicly traded corporation, this lady is on a whopper of a fixed income.
Now get this – she has two sons, aged 22 and 24, living in her home and she has asked them to pitch in and pay $30 a week.
“Stressed-Out Mom” says that they are now “ranting and raving and calling her a bad… CONTINUE READING >>
Helicopter Mom – You Are Grounded!
“A mother is only as happy as her saddest child,” a close friend’s grandmother used to say. When I first heard her say this, all three of my children were young and safely in the nest so I could totally relate. Somehow I thought once they were grown up this would change. It didn’t.Trouble finds its way into everyone‘s lives – and as much as we hate it – trouble finds our adult children. Whether it rears its ugly head in a… CONTINUE READING >>
Who’s Kidding Who?
The last task of raising a child is letting them go. Allowing them to flap their cute little wings and fly… giving them a gentle nudge out of the nest to get them airborne. Ah yes, little birdies, spread your wings and fly. OK, sometimes it’s more like a hard shove off a cliff… but the harder transition from the parent-child relationship to an adult-to-adult one must be made.This process doesn’t happen overnight. The ritual sounds easy in theory, but it can be a bit sticky in practice. It’s difficult not to be mommy or daddy and even harder for the chicks not to revert… CONTINUE READING >>
Grandchildish Behavior
I’ve had two unexpected conversations recently that have given me pause for reflection. The first was with my father-in-law while dining over Mexican food in Kansas. While catching him up with our kids’ lives, he asked me if they were dating anyone of note. I told him that at the moment there were no significant others. Then, the bolt out of the blue,
“Oh, you must be sad that you won’t be having grandchildren anytime soon.”
The next exchange was with my daughters, The Piglet and Decibel.
“All of our friends’ mothers are on crazy grandma patrol. How come you aren’t nagging us about having babies?”
It started out as gentle teasing, but… CONTINUE READING >>
Why Do People Like Us Even Have Kids?
@DianaHayes “Tell me why when a person says they enjoy the empty nest another person counters with – Oh, but I am close to my kids. ARGH”Receiving this sort of frustrated Tweet is not uncommon for us, this one came while sitting with our morning coffee in a hotel cafe. I had just returned from using the lobby bathroom where I overheard a cell phone conversation in the stall next to me.
Yes, I admit I was eavesdropping – but I have two lame excuses.
1) We had just… CONTINUE READING >>
Boomerang Brats
The author of “The Benefits Of Being A Boomerang Kid” lists three reasons that full grown adults should continue to force their parents to support them and, consequently, avoid contributing to the economy and society at large.
On the top of his list, spending Mom and Pop’s money instead of his own.
“Saving Up- With no rent or utilities, you can build up your nest egg as long as you’re disciplined.”
Gee that’s right Kid, no worries. Has it occurred to you that while you’re “building up your nest egg” that you’re depleting your parents’… CONTINUE READING >>
GypsyNesters on the Radio!
Get the GypsyNester story!We joined Jill and Claudia over at Empty Nester Radio and had a BLAST.
Listen in as we answer these great questions:
How did you become known as the GypsyNesters?
What did your kids say when you told them of your plans?
Do you have… CONTINUE READING >>
My Dirty Little Secret
David and I have one chick left in the nest. He graduates from high school in June. And I am marking the days. I keep a gigantic calendar and mark a red X each day. For my son’s sake (and to avoid horrified looks from house guests), I keep the calendar between the mattresses of my bed.
I’m fully aware how bad this looks, so I will explain myself. I LOVE MY KIDS! But, when June 8 rolls around, I will have spent almost twenty five years of my life raising them. I deserve this dirty little secret.
This callousness does not make me impervious to the emotional milestones along the way. I recently received my son’s cap and gown picture taken at his school. My heart literally … CONTINUE READING >>
